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11252023

Dear diary,

I wonder what I would do in the wee hours if there was no social media. I seem to always be awake sometime between 1:00 AM and 4:00 AM without fail daily. And without an alarm. But lately during these hours I either, lie awake trying to sleep, thinking.... Or I hop on social media and give up thinking my own thoughts the ones I've created within my mind and accept the ones that are out in the world and on social media, other people's thoughts. Perhaps I should give up social media and see what I do in the wee hours. Would I finally exercise? My body desperately needs it. Would I finally finish editing my books? They desperately need it. Would I write a new book? There are so many in my mind I'm waiting to write. And finding my zone in books is one of my favorite places in the world.

I guess my first favorite place is the world itself. Being in nature, that's my favorite place. Being at peace and calm and tranquility within nature. Any type of nature; the ocean, the view of the stars, the mountains, rivers, the lakes, the trees, the forest, the deserts. All of nature is so gorgeous and beautiful and I love it there. Definitely my first favorite place is nature. My second favorite place is books. I love drowning in someone else's world. Worlds where new things are possible. A world where the underdog wins. A world where change is possible. A world where things are exciting and the opposite of mundane, where average people can be heroes, where dreams can come true. I Absolutely love being in books. I Really do love reading. My third favorite place to be is the zone. The zone is in my mind when the story is around me. It's like I can see it and I could feel it and it's like I'm not myself. It’s like I'm in the body of someone else seeing through their eyes feeling their feelings just trying to write it down as best that I could see it. The zone is I guess my imagination, the depths of my imagination. Does my imagination have depth? Is there a certain depth to my imagination? The world of my stories feels as real when I'm in my zone as the tangible world around me. In some ways it is tangible when I'm deep in it. Sometimes I cry. Sometimes I laugh out loud. Sometimes I'm angry. I've even been aroused when I was deep in the zone. Often I dream my stories from different angles. It's like my imagination is all I really need in order to feel all of these other things.


Well, it's 5:47 AM and I've been awake since 1:30 AM wasting my life away on social media not even having the delight of feeling enriched by it. This is an unedited post and I hope my followers don't reem me for it… I haven't been posting lately because I’ve been deep in thought about my blog… Usually I edit every post before I post it, but it's supposed to be raw and unfiltered right? So here it goes.

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